Mensch Madness 2025: The Schmear 16

The quest to determine the very best bagel in Western Washington rolls on!

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UPDATE: Voting is now closed for the Schmear 16. Thanks to everyone who voted! Substack’s poll system will keep the polls open for a week, but the official results have been tallied. Voting for the next round begins Thursday.

Mensch Madness 2025, the quest to determine the very best bagel in Western Washington, kicked off last week. You guys didn’t disappoint, as hundreds of votes were cast in the Round of 32 matchups. Those votes have been tallied, and we have our Schmear 16.

In terms of March Madness and sports betting in general, “chalk” means the expected result. And for the most part, the first round of Mensch Madness went chalk. All of the one-seeds advanced, the top four seeds advanced in one bracket, two five-seeds advanced in two other brackets, and our lone “Cinderella” came in the form of a six-seed.

Many of the matchups were blowouts (Backyard Bagel garnered the biggest of them all, snagging 96% of the votes!), but we did have a few close calls. Atomic Bagels topped Sully Eats 57% - 43%, while Toasted barely eeked out a win over Westman’s with 52%. Every vote counts, is what I’m saying.

But enough about the past. Let’s look at the Schmear 16 matchups and get to voting! Remember, voting will be open through Tuesday at 11:59 p.m. PST. (Substack is a bit lacking in the poll end-time customization department, so I’m manually recording the winners even though the polls remain open).

1-seed Hey Bagel keeps chugging along as the hype train has yet to die down on Andrew Rubinstein’s second bagel act. However, they get a stiff challenge from Atomic Bagels, the pride of Port Angeles. Is this U Village bagel shop an unstoppable umami juggernaut, or can this Olympic Peninsula upstart garner the upset?

On the side of the bracket, Bellingham’s The Bagelry reaffirmed its place among the region’s best bagel shops. Meanwhile, Bloom Bistro proved to be a big-time player in the Seattle bagel scene. Who moves on to the next round, the Whatcom County mainstay or the Georgetown neighborhood newbie?

Mighty Mt. Bagel advanced to the Schmear 16, to the surprise of very few Seattle bagel fans. They’ll go head-to-head with Pinehurst’s Zylberschtein’s, which had a definitive victory over Rubinstein in the first round. Does Mt. Bagel’s efficient dominance continue, or can the North Seattle delicatessen smoke their pastrami?

On the other side of the bracket, both 2-seed Old Salt and 3-seed Rachel’s Bagels & Burritos cruised to victory in the first round. Now it’s a showdown between two Seattle bagel titans. Both have shops in Ballard, multiple locations, and menus with big, bold flavors, but only one can advance.

1-seed Bagel Oasis had an easy time advancing, while 4-seed Toasted made it by the thinnest margin of any first-round winner. Will the Seattle bagel stalwart keep moving forward, or can the new kids on the block achieve another victory?

2-seed Howdy Bagel made Tacoma proud, emerging from the first round with a decisive victory. The same can be said for 3-seed Loxsmith, which took its first-round battle by a margin of two votes to one. Head-to-head, however, how will this Seattle vs. Tacoma showdown shake out?

In the final bracket, we have 1-seed Backyard Bagel dominating its way into this round. Meanwhile, Montlake’s Oxbow put together an impressive victory over a strong challenger. Only one of these big winners can keep winning; which one will it be?

2-seed 6th Borough Bagels had a robust showing in the first round. Meanwhile, newcomer Bakery Louise is the lowest-remaining seed after a first-round upset. Can the pride of Olympia keep moving forward or will Cinderella keep dancing?

Remember, you’ve got until Tuesday, March 18, at 11:59 p.m. PST to cast your votes. The winners of this round will be announced next Thursday, and then we’ll start the Elite Eight.

And by all means, if you want to make a case about why certain bagel places should get someone’s vote, sound off in the comments!

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