Which New Jersey bagels should I review?

Learning the "nail salon theory" of NJ bagel shops could save your life.

Welcome to It’s A Shanda, one Northeastern Jew’s quest to find a decent bagel in Seattle (and beyond). Along with free bagel reviews every Sunday, we also offer bonus posts (like this one) each week. If you’re already subscribed, I hope you’ll consider upgrading to a paid subscription! Thank you for reading.

The closer the bagel shop is to a nail salon, the better. Credit: Bagel Nosh

On National Bagel Day in 2020, New Jersey officially declared itself the bagel capital of the world. I am incredibly biased but I tend to agree.

I’m not here to get into a NJ vs. NYC bagel war, but I will always think of the classic suburban Jersey shop first when I think about the ideal bagel scenario.

If you were to ask me where I would expect to find the best bagel in the world, I would say it’s probably sitting in a basket inside a narrow bagel shop tucked away in a strip mall originally built in the 1950s off of a numbered highway somewhere in New Jersey.

The perfect shop likely has a generic name like “Tony’s Bagel & Deli” or “Hot Bagels, Etc.” or “Bagels ‘n More.” It’s very close to a nail salon, perhaps even next door. The windows are all fogged up from the constant baking. The interior decor can best be described as “beige chic.” The Boar’s Head-themed menu board hasn’t been updated since 1987. There’s a bagel-related mural on one of the walls. The person behind the counter is simultaneously disinterested in helping you and also wants to serve you as efficiently as possible. They serve egg bagels, Dr. Brown’s, and Snapple. They do not serve rainbow bagels or kombucha. The bagels cost $1.25 each or $15 for a dozen. Their website is outdated and/or broken.

Sounds like perfection.

Always look for the nail salon… Credit: Google

I’m heading back to New Jersey next week. Although bagels won’t be the focus of my trip, it’s inevitable that I’m going to eat at least a few of them. Alas, my beloved Eli’s Hot Bagels is gone, so I’ll be adrift in a sea of schmears.

That’s where you come in. I might be from NJ but I’m a little rusty when it comes to knowing where the good stuff is these days. I'd love to hear some recommendations on which NJ bagel places I should try to hit up and review. I’ve looked at a bunch of the rankings and I’ve gotten a few reader suggestions, but I’m putting the call out to the many transplanted East Coasters who’ll see this.

The nail salon theory is never wrong. Credit: Google

I’m going to be mostly in Central New Jersey (which exists) and the Jersey Shore, so I’m way more likely to stop by a place in those regions. Of course, I know a lot of the recommendations are going to come from North Jersey, which is less likely to happen on this trip. Still, send’m over and I’ll see what I can do.

Also, I will probably be in NYC for a day, so if there’s a Manhattan bagel shop I haven’t reviewed yet that you’d like me to try next, shout that out as well.

One more bagel/nail salon combo for the road… Credit: Google

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