Can I find a good Brussels bagel at... Holy Bagels

The Belgians know chocolate and frites but do they know bagels?

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My recent European trip took me to Amsterdam, Paris, and London—a trio of heavy hitters practically guaranteed to deliver on the promise of incredible scenery and food. But do you know which city was the sneaky MVP of the trip?

Brussels.

My trusted producer and I only spent two days in the Belgian city, but pound-for-pound, it might have been the most fulfilling stop on the journey.

I expected Brussels to bring the old-world charm, and the scenes walking around Grote Markt were breathtaking (though the sheer number of people who stopped to take photos with statues of peeing children was disconcerting). The neoclassical architecture of Brussels Park and the Royal Palace was captivating. Relaxing in the Parc du Cinquantenaire and walking under the Cinquantenaire Arch was sublime.

Cinquantenaire Arch

It was also really cool to see how the old and new co-exist in the de facto capital of the European Union. The push-pull of being a place steeped in history and the focal point of modern politics was evident (Like every place we visited in Europe, their public transit system put ours to shame). Our hotel was close to the Ixelles neighborhood, where we snacked on frites, casually strolled along the park, and randomly ended up in an old abbey turned into a public garden. There was something interesting around every corner, or so it seemed.

And, of course, there was the food (and beer). The pancakes at Crème lived up to the hype (though the halloumi stack toast might have been even better). The depth of flavor in Takumi’s ramen may have single-handedly ruined our ability to order it elsewhere ever again). Plant-based restaurant verdō altered my entire view on asparagus. And I left Brussels wondering why there aren’t frites shops in every major American city. Why are we denying ourselves this?

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With a jam-packed schedule and so much to see, do, and eat, I didn’t expect to find time for a bagel review here. Then I remembered who I was and realized there was a bagel shop just 10 minutes from the hotel. And so, before shipping off to the idyllic city of Ghent, I took a walk to Holy Bagels for what I hoped would be a religious experience.

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“Holy Bagels is the story of Melodie & Jacques, an American bagel lover and a Cameroonian baker who grew up surrounded by coffee fields in Cameroon,” reads Holy Bagel’s website. While their endeavor started as a food bike that delivered bagels and coffees, they set up a storefront in early 2022 and expanded to include many other breakfast staples, salads, and sweets.

I was charmed and surprised by the sights, sounds, and foods in Brussels. Can I include their bagels in that experience? Let’s find out.

And if you want to know how I define a good bagel, you can find that here.

WHAT I ORDERED

• Plain bagel as-is

• Sesame & poppy bagel with cream cheese

THE EXPERIENCE

I rolled up to Holy Bagel early on a midweek morning. As I approached, I saw their logo, which includes a bagel. I looked at their windows, which have a bagel on them. And I walked inside… and didn’t see any bagels. I got momentarily very confused, walked back outside thinking I’d perhaps gone through the wrong door, realized this was indeed the bagel place, and went back inside.

While the bagels remained out of view, they were ever-present on the menu. Very much in line with my recent commentary, most options were sandwich-based. But they were happy to accommodate my weirdo request for a simple bagel as-is. When ordering, I was asked if I wanted the bagel toasted with a look that seemed to say, ‘An untoasted bagel, what are you crazy?’ so I rolled with it.

UPON FIRST GLANCE

holybagels

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Holy Bagels keeps things very simple. Hand-rolled bagel flavors include sesame, poppy, and sesame-poppy. I went with the sesame to replicate my usual plain order and a sesame-poppy as my everything alternative, though I didn’t get the sense they had that heavy of a seed hand either way. I also noted the bagels were pre-sliced to accommodate their sandwich-focused menu. I had a hunch that my bagel-centric review style wouldn’t match what they’ve got going on.

TOP

In Amsterdam, I got a bagel that resembled a Q. This time, my sesame bagel was more of a lowercase e. It was slightly larger than the norm and featured a medium-small center. The coloring was beige to light brown and included a smattering of seeds. The top was very soft to the touch, with some crinkly, textural ridges.

In the words of Linda Richman, “Talk amongst yourselves. I’ll give you a topic. This sesame-poppy bagel was neither sesame nor poppy. Discuss!” I’ve pulled plain bagels out of a bag of a dozen with more seasoning on them.

The bagel was a good size, featured a small center, and was more evenly circular than the sesame. The coloring on top was beige to light brown, with some textural lines throughout. The top was very soft and roll-like.

BOTTOM

The bottom of the sesame was Nike swoosh-esque. Its golden brown coloring spread all the way across. It was soft but slightly firm and crinkly to the touch. No Cornmeal Ring of Doom (CRoD) was present, but I noted grid lines running the length of the bagel.

The sesame-poppy bottom was light to golden brown and featured those grid lines from the bake. Thanks to the toasting, it was firm to the touch. There was no CRoD.

INSIDE/BITE

The sesame bagel offered a very soft rip and doughy bite. The chew gave me a real roll-esque feel. Some crispness was present from the toasting, though the interior got mushy as I ate. I didn’t get any flavor from the bagel, which tasted blank.

My first thought when biting into the sesame poppy was that it tasted like a good frozen bagel, though I will say that it grew on me a little after a couple of bites. The crispy exterior was doing battle with a soft, deflating interior. The bagel rebounded nicely after the bite, so credit is due. The cream cheese application was slight, and the schmear was somewhat tangy, soft, and oozy.

FINAL THOUGHTS

Like many bagel places I’ve encountered lately, Holy Bagels is more about the sandwich experience than the bagel itself. I didn’t vibe with the sesame, but my takeaway from the sesame-poppy with cream cheese was that it was like eating a really good frozen bagel. I am aware I am damning them with faint praise.

Is It Good Enough For The Goys?

By all accounts, the Brussels goyim are big fans. Plans for a second Holy Bagels location appear to be underway. I will say that they had a lot of other items on the menu that looked good. It’s also in a prime location to be a go-to neighborhood coffee spot, so they’re doing just fine without my whining.

Is It Good Enough For Northeastern Jews?

If my fellow NEJs find themselves in Brussels, I’d suggest skipping bagels while there and sticking to the tried-and-true options: fries, waffles, pancakes, chocolates, and beer. You’ll do just fine.

Thanks for actually reading this far. If you enjoyed my bagel review and want to read more of them, make sure you’re subscribed to It’s A Shanda. Know someone in the Greater Seattle Area (or beyond) who would appreciate way-too-detailed reviews of local bagels? Please forward the link their way.